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February 17, 2008

      once,someone asked me my viewpoint of definition of friendship.at that time,i just answered roughly,"it's the realationship among the people who are willing to share their sorrows and happiness,and it's a kind of relationship much different from the feelings among relatives and lovers" however,when i pick up this issue again,i find that it's not so simple as i thought.

    friends can sort into several species.let me see,more than 5 kinds.it's utterly rather complicated.

    first,we have convenient friends who account for a large proportion in our friend group.what's the meaning of convenient friends,u may wanna ask.let me tell u.check ur phone booklet and u'll find the answer.in the list,is there anyone who u are not acquaint with,or even only know by his/her name or job ? they are the person i mean by convenient friend.they can be ur neighbours,business partners,person who gives u a hand occasionally,and so forth.on the whole,they are the person who are available to offer u some kind of help and that's just what u wanna get from this relationship--the convenience.so u just connect them  when u realize it's nacessary.

     apart from that,in the course of receiving education,u will make friends with ur classmates,schoolmate or some professors.u would exchange some academic or life experience with each other.besides,if u get a job,u could come to know some good fellows and communicate with them frequently.these friends can be arranged into growth-compannions.although they are put into two parts,there's something in common.that is even u don't connect with them frequently,ur friendship can come back to the usual way as soon as u get in tounch with them again.

    this article haven't been finished yet.i'll continue next time...

February 16, 2008

 firstly i would like to tell u a real story.once ago,a couple had lived together for 50 years.although they ofen had some quarrels with each other---maybe it had somethig to do with their different nationalities so that they always had some misunderstanding between them,anyhow,their relationship was still went on.nevertheness,almost at every night,they went to bed with anger.coz none of them was willing to concede to the other.untill one day,the wife wake up and found her hunsband died of heart disease in the morning.the wife cried loudly and regreted leaving the feeling of anger rather than love as the last thing given to her hunsband. .

   as the saying goes,never share quarrel with ur loved one before going to bed.coz no one knows in which moment ur loved one will leave u.don't regret untill there's no chance to pitch up.

   so how to avoid quarrels,there're many ways.of thousands of measures,there's a little but useful tip for good communication.that is speaking in the positive way.

   giving suggestions to ur lover is commonplace.but whether ur partner will accept it in the pleasant way?that's would be a question.hence,we should take some skills in the mutual communication---spread the love message all the time.always progress positively.

    it's better to tell the children,"honey,u..."just say it in a positive way instead of the nagative way that we most ofen do.

   for instance,we say,"don't be so dirty",but we could say,"honey,keep yourself clean." and the word "clean" will go inside the mind instead of the word "dirty."

   it doesn't matter whether u say the "don't" or "do."it's the essence of the sentence,that's important.most people say,"don't be so dirty,""don't be so cruel," or "don't be so nasty,"this,that and the other,instead just say,"be kind,be gentle,be gracious,be graceful,"and then the essence of the words will boil down to "kind,gentle,graceful."and when everything else is gone,only the essence remains.

    change the way u speak to ur loved one right now and treasure the time u spend with them.u can find it will work out very good and everyday will be a nice day.


08:40 AM Feb 16 2008



thank you for this meaningful lesson.

I think everyone needs this kind of advices and advisors like you

again thank you for sharing with us

February 15, 2008

it is ackownledged that every girl has the dream of finding her ideal Mr Right  one day.so do i.having gone through  two times failed love experiences,i still can't get the meaning of love,coz both of them lasted not long.none of them lasted for a year.i really want  to have someone loved by me and i also hope someone really and perfectly love me.but why i can't own that long?and how can i maintain a long/forever romantic relationship?

i thought deeply and i work it out.that was happened several days before.after i talked my love experience with one of my friends,i found the answer.the answer is that love is not one person's thing but it's the thing refer to two person.the course of the love experience is the exchanging of love feelings between two person and the processe of understanding of each other.

maybe i'm a little shy and sorta of  selfish girl when i'm involved in the stuff of love.when my ex-boyfriends told me that they loved me,i always acted very clumsily.it was very rarly for me to take the initialtive to express my love feelings.and sometimes i was not sensitive enough  that i couldn't figure their internal meaning of their words out.at last,i missed the chance to express myself.it's something ofen happen in two couples and it won't couse a very serious trouble.however,after such things happen again and again.someone will reach his/her limitation and become not active as they usually do.and this kind of thing also happened in my love jounery.and it coused very bad results.--breaking up.

nevertheness,i didn't realize the reason why they became some kinda of cold to me .i didn't realized it was also my wrong doing.what's wrose,i even blamed them.when our relationship got far worse,at last,i though they were not the soulmate i was trying to find out and i asked breaking up...

this is my experience.the reason why i'm wrote it is that i hope such a bad thing won't take place anymore or just happen less in our life.my friend,if u are in the love relationship now,pls remember that understanding is extramely important and expressing ur feeling towords u lover is necessary ! don't regret untill u find that u have to end a precious love jounery.

just now,i'm crazly in the love relationship with some guy,and i'll take every chance to cherish him.

remember love is the thing between two people not only one.sometimes,u should express ur love feeling to him/her.that will make ur love jounery filled with afreshment ! and that's the formula of maintaining a endless love relationship.

12:31 AM Feb 16 2008


  • why not send me your downs(problem), i might be of great help to you.