My Blog
Viet Nam
November 23, 2009
Everyday, I expected he said he loved me. But why was it so long? Or he just considered me as a little sister and best friend ? Finally, I said I love him. Suddenly, his face is embarrassing. Wind blew through my hair, coldly. I couldn't feel warmth in my heart even though he was standing right here. Nothing had changed. He still said nothing, looked into the distance. I touched his hand, my eyes looked as if they wanted to cry. Then he said :"Can I say that I haven't loved you yet?"
Haha, I was such an dreamy girl. I must have known that he was not my man. He was born for hot girls, not a silly and poor girl like me. I could go out with him so many times, it was totally a dream. That was too bad when people didn't want to dream any more. But it was even worse when people couldn't express their love. And I never wanted to be a mute doll, never wanted to have a mute love and never wanted to be refused.
One day, he said he loved me [truly]
Day after day, I was with you and sweet words, warm hugs, ...... there was no stronger words to describe our love. Just know that you loved me, I loved you. We loved each other. It was enough! Every night, I thought about our past, present and even future. What would happened ? I didn't know though I was sure I would love you forever.
_____It was a long time I couldn't meet him, sms or make a phone call______
One day, he sent me a sms and made an appointment with me on tomorrow evening. He hesitated :"I have some important things to say with you." What were your important things? Met him, I couldn't notice any eagerness in him as the past. He took me to a yard where had a swing. It was many years I hadn't seen any swing. I remember the childhood when in my mind there had only parents and funny things. The distance between two stages of one person, it was so long that my memories had already been away from me, no way to get back. I need to cry.
Then we sat down. He asked: " Why do you love me ?". What a funny question ! I had written the answer by my mind but couldn't make a sound. I still answered him. Next, I asked him the same. But he didn't answer. Never did and never will. Why not ? Why didn't you answer me? I really wanted to scream. Tears which I was preventing from dropping, were falling down my face. He continued making silent moments and gave me no answer. Instead, he said to me another saying which I couldn't believe in my ears until now :"If an emotion in our heart suddenly disappears, what will happen ?" I didn't understand. "If I don't love you anymore, what will....."
I couldn't hear anything and my eyes became blurer. Tears helped me didn't saw him. I hated him even though I loved him. Why did you say this ? Then he wiped the tears on my face. After all, I kissed him once more. The last....
Haha, I was such an dreamy girl. I must have known that he was not my man. He was born for hot girls, not a silly and poor girl like me. I could go out with him so many times, it was totally a dream. That was too bad when people didn't want to dream any more. But it was even worse when people couldn't express their love. And I never wanted to be a mute doll, never wanted to have a mute love and never wanted to be refused.
One day, he said he loved me [truly]
Day after day, I was with you and sweet words, warm hugs, ...... there was no stronger words to describe our love. Just know that you loved me, I loved you. We loved each other. It was enough! Every night, I thought about our past, present and even future. What would happened ? I didn't know though I was sure I would love you forever.
_____It was a long time I couldn't meet him, sms or make a phone call______
One day, he sent me a sms and made an appointment with me on tomorrow evening. He hesitated :"I have some important things to say with you." What were your important things? Met him, I couldn't notice any eagerness in him as the past. He took me to a yard where had a swing. It was many years I hadn't seen any swing. I remember the childhood when in my mind there had only parents and funny things. The distance between two stages of one person, it was so long that my memories had already been away from me, no way to get back. I need to cry.
Then we sat down. He asked: " Why do you love me ?". What a funny question ! I had written the answer by my mind but couldn't make a sound. I still answered him. Next, I asked him the same. But he didn't answer. Never did and never will. Why not ? Why didn't you answer me? I really wanted to scream. Tears which I was preventing from dropping, were falling down my face. He continued making silent moments and gave me no answer. Instead, he said to me another saying which I couldn't believe in my ears until now :"If an emotion in our heart suddenly disappears, what will happen ?" I didn't understand. "If I don't love you anymore, what will....."
I couldn't hear anything and my eyes became blurer. Tears helped me didn't saw him. I hated him even though I loved him. Why did you say this ? Then he wiped the tears on my face. After all, I kissed him once more. The last....
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08:34 AM Nov 29 2009 |
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RinDinh
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04:54 AM Nov 24 2009 |
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lauyachong
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04:54 AM Nov 24 2009 |
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lauyachong
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08:11 PM Nov 23 2009 |
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sat1
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November 11, 2009
It was nearly the New Year, the time when I always went out to buy stuffs for parents. They were busy and wanted me to help them decorating our house. But this day I went out with my classmates, we hadn't seen each others for two weeks. One of my girl friend suggested having lunch. When I was telling some funny stories, my classmates were laughing, there was a boy came next to me. He said that he wanted to make friend with us. After the introduction, we knew he went to this cafeteria with a group. All of them are in grade 11. At this moment, I notice a special boy, who was sitting behind others. It wouldn't be anything to remember if this night I didn't receive SMS from a strange number. I learned many things about this stranger after asking him some questions. He was the person who I noticed at the first sight in the group I had met this morning. Now remember, he was also the most handsome boy I had ever seen. From this night on, we talked many times and sometimes we dated, sometimes I went to his house which is such a great villa.
"I remember every night and every morning. You always send me SMS and wished me nice dream, nice day. All were English. Of course I understood but I had difficulty in replying all in English. Then I asked my deskmate. These days were really a dream for me. Every SMS I had got was a note of the tune which I considered as the love song for my own life."
"I remember every time you came over to my house and picked me up. We went everywhere. Park, restaurant, cinema, your school, ... You made me think that though I was only a fifteen-year-old girl and only in grade 9 of secondary school, I had the opportunity to fall in love."
"I remember. It was a beautiful afternoon. I came to you rvilla. The first time you invited me to go into your room. The largeness and luxury surprised me at all. I specially noticed your photo collections n the wall. When I was watching them, you secretly come towards me, stayed close behind me. Suddenly you kiss me. A wet and hesitated kiss - my first kiss. It didn't last too long but heart couldn't stop beating faster. There has no permanent love, only has permanent moment of love. I think it will ever and forever be my permanent moment"
"I remember every night and every morning. You always send me SMS and wished me nice dream, nice day. All were English. Of course I understood but I had difficulty in replying all in English. Then I asked my deskmate. These days were really a dream for me. Every SMS I had got was a note of the tune which I considered as the love song for my own life."
"I remember every time you came over to my house and picked me up. We went everywhere. Park, restaurant, cinema, your school, ... You made me think that though I was only a fifteen-year-old girl and only in grade 9 of secondary school, I had the opportunity to fall in love."
"I remember. It was a beautiful afternoon. I came to you rvilla. The first time you invited me to go into your room. The largeness and luxury surprised me at all. I specially noticed your photo collections n the wall. When I was watching them, you secretly come towards me, stayed close behind me. Suddenly you kiss me. A wet and hesitated kiss - my first kiss. It didn't last too long but heart couldn't stop beating faster. There has no permanent love, only has permanent moment of love. I think it will ever and forever be my permanent moment"
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08:19 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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julywidiawati
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umm... I like read your blog, hope I can read the next chapter..though I always read at a glance on a sad blog... |
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08:07 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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RinDinh
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06:27 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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julywidiawati
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wew..seems like love is in the air...enjoy... |
November 7, 2009
today, I introduced with my friends my story, which I have written for months.....
The cactus
Written by a seventeen-year-old girl10 years ago, I met you in my neighborhood, in front of my house, you were crying because of hurt fingers. Although you were older than me by 3 years, I had not considered you as a friend or brother, I always laughed at your weakness.
8 years ago, on a sunny day, your grandfather brought you home a cactus, I noticed you hated it very much, and only admired from a distance. I wondered why.
6 years ago, you told me a story. It was 4 years ago, when his hand got stuck in a cactus, it was injured severely. The image of his bloody hand was marked deeply in his mind. The first time, I cried, not for myself.
3 years ago, when I was 14, you were 17. I slowly understood what was laying on my heart, I really didn't want to say goodbye every afternoon. You taught me how to complete homework in the right way. You inspired me by telling anecdotes which filled me with warmth, you took some twilight photos for me which I saw every night before sleeping time. I had thought you were my life. A girl had no friend. She survived deathly and slept until you came. Yesterday, my father presented me a small cactus.
2 years ago, my cactus grew up and had a lot of flowers. My father said that cactus only bloomed once a year. The first time in my life, I knew flowers of cactus existed. I contemplated them with much eagerness. A plant that seems to make people hurt, seems to be tough, seems to live lonely, can bloom. You said "I love cactus", "why? ", "because it is the same as you", "why?", "you are lonely, you are surrounded by chilliness made from your melancholy childhood, but there has been a hidden power, waits for the right time. And the result are flowers or your smiles". We always think that cactus is bad when we still don't see its flowers. I wanted to say something to you. Why was it so difficult to open my mouth?
1 year ago, you went away from me. Your parents supplied you with an amount of money for studying abroad. You said: "Can I bring your cactus to where I live?", "why?". You laughed: "I love your cactus". Your image was becoming blurry and then totally lost on the runway. Really, I missed you so much, I cried like a rain the day after you disappeared. Finally, I understood, I had been loving you for years. Why couldn't I realize it? Why couldn't I say? Why couldn't I come out of my shell? And, why couldn't you love me? ....
Today, I learn the news that you died. Two days before you left, the cactus had died on a stormy night. It brought you to the heaven and now you are doing the same with me.
*And for those left moments, I truly feel you love me as well
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08:13 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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julywidiawati
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08:03 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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RinDinh
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06:31 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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julywidiawati
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06:05 PM Nov 11 2009 |
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RinDinh
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07:31 AM Nov 09 2009 |
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Jin_Soichiro
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08:54 AM Nov 07 2009 |
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aliali_june
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A good and sad story.............. |
