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January 20, 2009

     Do you know the feeling one feels after finding the real meaning of life? Something in itself bigger than life,more than religion, more than ideologies, doctrines and philosophies, more than culture, more than imagination and enlightment and more than any institution of life. Something that explains everything. It's a feeling that is unexplainable, yet undeniable-the joy, the peace, the fulfilment and sense of contentment. Suddenly life all makes sense, and everything appears clear. Everything changes; your desires and what use to give you pleasure, your dreams and goals, your ambitions, your priorities, and generally your life-it just changes. It feels like you died and ressurected in to a brand new person with a new sense of identity, purpose and direction. People who thought they knew you well and called themselves 'your friends' notice the change, the joy, and the light in you. You try to explain to them but they thought you have gone nuts, lost you sanity, because you no longer want to hang out and do the things you used to do and no longer share the same views of life that they do. They begin calling you names, ridiculing you, avoiding you, then tagging you as a 'no-longer-cool' type. But that only makes the fire in you burn more fiercely and grows the faith you have in your new found life. You become simply unbreakable, its unmistakeable, you aren't going down no matter what others think about you. Excited and enthusiastic about your discovery you try to share it with anyone who would listen to you, but your sincere convection is mostly greeted with a cold, 'back-off' attitude.
People who bearly know you impromtu drop you in the category of  a hypocritical,
condescending, condemning, judgmental, intolerant, and incompatible with open-minded multiculturalistic fanatic. I have been there and I know how it feels, I know the boundless joy and yes, they are partially right, I am a fanatic. I'm obsessed with the Truth because I know it is the power to save and reorder lives- that's what it has done with mine, what more than 80% of the world population are searching for. And I know what the true meaning of life is, because I've been there too. And I want you to know it also, I want to share it with you, yes, you! If you could listen with an open heart I believe it will be the beginning of a new life for you, trust me.
Here is my story and how it changed. While I was growing up, I was just the normal kid in a strict religious background and awesome family. I got all the natural affection and stuffs I need from family and friends and life was smooth, with nothing to worry about-at least nothing serious- very thing was cool until I entered in to early teenage. I am the curious and inquisitive type, I began asking questions that I had no answers for, and nobody (especially adults) gave me the answer that did satisfy my little but expanding mind, so I kept searching. I asked questions about God and to God; like "are You real?", "why do You let bad things happen?", "are You really in control, or are you just sitting around and letting things happen just like that?", "So, You're gonna kill me someday, won't you?" "Is hell real, or a metarphor, why would a Creator creat people just to throw them in there? that's mean!", "There are too many religions that all claim to be right and to take us to You, God, but which one is really right, what if  mine is wrong?", "Can anybody tell me WHAT LIFE IS ALL ABOUT and what I'm doing in this damned planet?". These are just some of the innocent quetions the early adolesecent me asked. And the more I grew, the more questions I asked and the more unanswered they went and the more confused I became. Even though at home everything was straight; the doctrines, ideas and philosophies of life I was exposed to through friends, media, education, were so diverse and plenty and I didn't know which one was particularly right for me to pick and follow. I only blindly believed I was on the right track. But inside, I was in constant conflict with myself. Outside, I was just the typical confident boy who lived life for himself and never really care about others, it was me, me, and me, in the morning, afternoon and night. All I cared about was to impress others and have fun with friends I never really care about. I was domineering, manupilative, controlling and feared by the younger kids. I bullied in soccer field, tackled anyone I felt threaten by. Anger was my best expression and no one could defeat me in an argument. When I'm angry, I will hold the ball, or remove the goal post and go home; game over for the day. I also got addicted to a destructive adolescence habit at 12,14. When I look back, I see me as a little devil or some thing like that, much contrasted to who I am today. I wanted all the cool things for myself, but the more I had, the more empty I felt and the more I wanted more. It followed through my life. It was like I was in a rat race, circles that never ends, in a fight that everybody punches me. I knew that this was far from the life I ultimately want to live and I'd hear a silent little voice in my heart telling me I needed to change. But I was too obssessed with myself to quiet down and listen. I use to think to myself "this is the prime of my life, a time I ought to enjoy and have fun", "I am indespensable and invincible" I thought. Until a series of events occurred in my life that gave me no option but to believe I was  perishable and a Power has been watching out for me; first I almost got hit and killed by a car,How I escaped was miracously. I was just lucky I thought. Then while on a field trip organised by my school months after that, I almost drowned in a spring after a game-veiwing safari, but again I miracously escaped. More events as such kept occurring that drive me in to thinking and believing that I was just a mortal who could have died in any one of the preceeding incidence. That was scary, but not as scary as the question "after I die then what next? Is it all over, nothing more? what did I live my life for? and what will the after-life be like for me?" While growing up I was always told that when we die we go to Heaven, but that faded in the dissonance inside, I had a personal and real question now,"where do I go after death? Heaven or Hell?" I was never sure then, even though I knew certainly well that both are as real as the air I breathe I still wasn't sure were I'll be landing. That made me slow down abit.
 Then it all unfolded one particularly summer. Something happened that answered most of my questions-especially the meaning of life and where I was going after death. The summer of 2007 A friend invited me to a 5-day summer camp, well, he persuaded me per say and I didn't have nothing doing at home after all, so why not go and drag away sometime and escape my monotony at home. I succeeded in convincing two of my cousins who were over for the holidays; They thought it wasn't a cool idea. But I was persuasive enough, they reluctantly agreed.
Having a different plan for attending the camp, it amazed me how those five days could usher the metamorphosis of my life, a change of a life time.
 In the camp, we made friends during rest times and sports time but most times it was talks and seminars about entreprenuership, time-manegement, sex, love and relationships, health, academic excellence and lots more, day and night. One talk stood out from the others though and touched heart in a way I never assumed it could. "God chaser!" That was the topic. The resource person spoke about how we keep running away God, trying to ignore Him and heading our own way to destruction and yet being unaware and thinking it is fun. His message was a direct description of the state of my life so I managed to be attentive and catch all he's got to say. I was running 120 miles per hour away from God and still denying it ("Having a form of Godliness, but denying it's power"), afraid that if God catches me He will take away my fun and ground me for life. I've always thought God was this Big Guy up above waiting for us sin so He could punch us and always want us to solemnly go through some terible times to test us, and if we are good enough He rewards us. But that day, I was made to see and believe God in a whole new way, and a whole new perspective; A Heavenly Father  who loves us with an everlasting love, who is willing to forgive us, take us in, cleanse us and heal us, no matter how messed-up we are, not minding what we did the night before or seven years ago. He'll wash us and take away our guilt. Nothing in this world could make Him love us more or less. He is a God Who loves the atheist but hate athiesism, a God Who loves the prostitute, but hates prostituition, Who loves the criminal, but hates his crimes, Who loves the porn star and hates pornography, Who loves the fornicator and adulterer but hate fornication and adultry, Who loves the pot addict but hates his actions. He loves me, but He hates my rebellion. "For while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us" the Bible says. His love is limitless and eternal and He wants us to be happy and have fun without going out of His will and hurting ourselves, He wants the best for us; that is evident in His original plan for the human race. He created everything perfect in the beginning, void of pain and sorrow and sickness and hunger, and death! In the garden of eden (eden means enjoyment by the way) and that was what life was about, that was what it was suppose to be, enjoying the fellowship of a living and loving God in a perfect world. Another interesting thing is He gave us a choice to obey Him or not, so that we can love Him for us, not because we are forced. As the man spoke, my heart was stired down within and I knew that message was for me. He continued, and explained were pain and sorrow can from; from our disobedience, doing any things outside God's will, that's called sin. The first people disobeyed, they rebelled against God's love and goodness, and that is what all of us still do when we ignore His love and live our lives our own way, we are all born in to that sinful nature and by saying "its no big deal" it shows how stubborn we are. So that first sin brought evil, pain, sorrow and seperation between God and man. Our rebellion in ignoring God-Who is the reason why we are alive- keeps widening that seperation and altering God's purpose for a harmonious and joyful life with Him at the center. (No wonder nothing fills that emptiness and longing that is in all of us. Only God can.) In His mercy and unfailing love He made a plan to rescue His lost world, He scarifice His perfectly blameless Lamb-Jesus so he took all our sins- past, present, future- on Him and died with them just to make us right with God. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that WHOSOEVER believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life."( This is the first Scripture I memorised in my life.) That verse had never made so much sense and bring tremendous comfort and assurance than it did that day. He explain that all the while we are running away from God, God was always behind us, waiting for us to stop, turn and He will reach for us. All it takes is for us to trust and believe in Him and accept the sacrifice of pardon that He had made for us, then to live the rest of our lives in obedience to Him, that was the key to ETERNAL LIFE, to freedom, to joy, peace, healing, fulfillment and He will take us back to Eden. That offer was too excellent to be rejected, I stopped running that day and broke down in God's loving arms and cried out my sincere repentance to Him- I practically died that day and again ressurected in to a new man spiritually.
Thesame God, who is a respecter of no person is reaching out in love to you saying "Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with Me." (Rev. 3:20) Can you hear Him knocking? All you have to do is to open the door of your heart. Jesus Christ wants to have a personal relationship with you, more than just an empty religious ritual worship but an intimate friendship with the creator of your soul who knows all it's need for divine intimacy. Picture, if you will, Jesus stretching out His hands to you and saying "Child, quit running, come home," Why don't you get down and surrender your all, give the game up and come home.
You are a single prayer away from home, take the step in faith.
It will be the most important decision of your life.
I want to hear from you, and encourage you in anyway I can yahaluke@yahoo.com

07:06 PM Apr 23 2009

Miss_Diana

Miss_Diana
Zimbabwe

That is so true!

There is a God! It's so evident, you don't need to be rational to understand. The Bible is the great letter that God let us to know him, and doesn't exist other book like that... Read it!

He change my everything, I can testify with my life too =)
He is alive, and He loves you!

 

04:00 AM Feb 07 2009

Nighty

Nighty
China

hmm... I have read it. you are right, it´s really long ^^ 

I see your point, and I´m happy for you that you have found your meaning of life. Really, somehow I envy you. It´s great to know why you are here and not somewhere else or why you should live your life. I believe that it feels amazing, like you have written in the beginning. 

there people on this earth, who are ready to die for a truth. And I´m not just talking about god and religion. If someone believes in something so hard, they can and will do everything for it and of course automatically they have a goal and a dream in their life. they believe, and that´s like fuel for their lifes.

But somehow I´m different. how should I describe it. I have also asked some questions like is there really a god etc when I was a kid, and still now, I´m asking it. It´s hard for me to believe in something. you can tell me that there is a god, which is great and have  a unlimited love for everyone. BUT it´s useless how hard I try, I just cann´t believe it. I´m not saying that there is no god at all, I believe that he exists for some people, people like you. but not for people like me. 

I´m not sure if you can understand me or not. maybe not :), it´s ok. I have tried to believe, but it just doesn´t work for me. maybe i´m just too rational? I don´t know. I also have a empty hole somewhere in my heart, but I cann´t fill it with the same stuff as you. And that´s what I´m looking for, the certain something which I cann´t find. 

thank you for your nice comments on my site!

have a nice day :D

Nighty

 

 

06:43 PM Jan 20 2009

yumiko_88

yumiko_88
Japan

i could say that i got your point there, and you express it well. although it was a long article and it took me sometime to decipher it.. i could say that i was influenced by the "law of attraction"

it was great anyway.

 

More entries: Eureka!: Finding life. (3), New Year New Life (1), Forgiven (1), Loving the sparrow in me, The little things make the big difference, Adieu, Grand Pa (1), It Doesn't Get Any Better!, A Chat With Hope., Unfailing Love

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Info

30

Male


Location

Nigeria

Study

College

Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria.

Science

Faculty of Science, Department of Computer Science. School is fun, studies is not!

English Study

Nigeria

Intermediate

Interests

Putting smiles on people's faces,soliloquizing,Poetry and Article writing, making friends, smiling, gesting, cooking noodles(it's the only thing i can cook properly) and lots more.

Jesus, being different,Hong, my little nephews, nature, poetry, inter racial and inter-tribal friendships,peace, solitude, human touch, my family, documentaries, JCTV, LDG youth camps, biology,maths(excluding calculus), falling in love, soccer,unity and finally being just the honest me. And recently Chemistry.

judgmental hypocrites,Racial and tribal discrimination, humiliation,Pride and conceit,gluttony, greed and selfishness,mosquitoes, Evil desires, injustice and corruption, promiscuity, debauchery, atheisms, extreme liberalism,talking in hush voices and giggling, babysitting and much more.

brown, army green & black

Noodles and dan wake.

Apple juice.

gospel pop & rock,country, slow RnB. I precisely like "Who Am I"by casting crowns, "Made To Love" by tobymac, "Do Yo Thang" by kj-52

a walk to remember, love notes , the champ, the patriot, Passion of Christ.( movies that make me cry like a baby and take life more seriously)

: yn4c.net