mehrzad_103

Hi friends , i decided to put some of my essays that i wrote as practice for Toefl on my profile. i hope you guys helpe me and correct me to find my errors.

Topic 1 : People attend college or university for many diffrent reasons (For example , new experience , career preparation , increased knowledge) why do you think people attend college or university ?

contrary to old days when people paid much less attention to the education, and an insignificant number of people pursued their studies in tertiary level, in present day youngsters and even aged people are keen to study in college and university for variety of reasons that some of which is mentioned in the Topic sentence.
As I see it, in addition to those reasons, some people go for university studies because of respect that university degree might bring them. It is argued that people holding university are more honorable in society. The way people look at educated individuals is far different and better than they look at uneducated ones.
Promotion in job is another argument encouraging people to conduct their supplementary education. the more educated you are, the more chance you have to get promotion thus you can have a better life.
In my opinion, receiving respect in milieu and getting promotion in career are two potential reasons that tempt people to study in college and university.