H2O2

Im 18 now. There is a boy I cant let him go. May be writing my feeling

down will make me feel better.

A boy, called Jonathan, from US.. We met at the first time in my school

with his beautiful soft big eyes old sister and their tall father. They

wanna help us to improve our English. I have to admit it that I fell in

love at first sight when Im 14 and, I still care about him so much

though we never touched before 2 years, cuz he doesnt reply me all

the time and it tortures me all the time though I have sent him several

emails. I open my email box everyday, but always disapointed me. My

heart broken again and again and there is only one thing I can do--

cry. I hate myself! A pride and confident girl turn to be so silly and low

self-esteem.  

Cast my mind back, receiving and replying his email is the most

important and exciting thing in a day, cuz he is so funny and wise, he

is so excellent. In his study, he is always top in his school and he is

a team-leader in the tennis team of his school in L.A.. He loves

photograph, and he is good at it. I love it too... Well, in the brief, In my

mind, HE IS THE BEST  BEST BOY IN THE WORLD!  However, Im always

stupid when I email him. Actually, I am always stupid in front of him!

And the stupid one  is not real me! I am a funny happy outgoing

easygoing kind and openhanded girl, but when I emailed him or

phoned him (well... phoned once) I am stupid and stupid and stupid!

Oh! And BORING and SERIOUS... Who like such a girl be like this! So I

shouldnt blame he ignores me and my emails. I always read the

emails that he has emailed me. Im soo  happy with sadness, a

strange feeling.

I dreamt him last night, he visits my home, he is more handsome and

taller. When I wanna kiss him, I woke up. Based on past experience,

when I dreamt him, it means he emailed me. But this time, I woke up

immediately and opened my email box, nothing... Sad and funny...

haha! how funny am I!

Why I still cant forget about you? Four years!!! Jonathan! I just saw you once!! I maybe miss you too much!!