My Dairy

  2010.6.4

   Maybe I really should qiut  this,I mean being  depressed as hell.But I  don't know  how.Maybe I should just do it ,trying to distract myself.I'm not so sure about the whole going  home thing,especially after talking with W.He really has ambitions.He has already found his own direction.That's cool,being busy with the thing you love and being fully involve in it.I feel happy for him as a friend.But I do crave going home.I am getting a little afraid without a reason.And after all the exams taken already,I have been too tired to concentrate on the coming computer exam,even the final exams.Where am I heading to?I haven't even got a clue.What if I couldn't be able to provide my family with a good living condition?What  if  I couldn't be able to do the things I love?What if I would have to leave my beloved behind? I hate it when I have to make choices.

2010.6.5

   I've been through a miserable day.I couldn't get a ticket for there has been no seat for me which means I might not be able to go back home for this 3-day holiday.I helped a woman with a little child holding her hand to buy a ticket to Shangqiu.She said they had something emergency to deal with at home.But I myself couldn't buy one to my hometown Anyang.I felt so helpless.Besides I broke up with a friend.It's a little complicated.I guess I will never want to see him again.It hurts,really.