How can I do?

It is a hard job to learn English!I love it,but always the problem that I couldn't enjoy with the process,no special condition,no foreigners,no partners,oh,I'm a lonely English learner.

   I'm going to give a speech of English competition next month,it's my great honored,it has made me nervous since I heard the news.It has took me most of the time to fight with my work and part time job once in a while.I was really tired when I came home after work. What I thought in my mind was how hard to find out someone who's a foreigner could be communicated with me patiently.

  Grammar is my weakness.I hate the grammar!

                                 kimmy