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nangphuongdong

Viet Nam

August 15, 2009

I just watched a TV show yesterday. The name is ``Secret lives of woman´´. And that show specialized in Swinger. So, what is swinger. Honestly, that time is the first time I realized that there is somewhat a shocking definition like that existing. Of course, just only shocking to me, cause I am not a maybe modern girl, and I am not American, or any English natives. Therefore, that definition is so strange to me. And I guess in my country, that kind of thing is also too new.

To me, from that show, I learnt that swinging can be somehow understood like changing partner, straightly, that means your spouse will have sexual intimacy with the spouse from another partner, and vice versa. Of course, understanding in my easy way, it is like that. It's not the official definition, and I don't know what it exactly the official definition for this concept. But to figure out more, you can go to wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swinging. They have a very full content, which I even don't read all and don't want to know all, about swinging there. Honestly, it's not the definition shocking me, but the fact. The fact is in America there is 1.5 million couples swinging regularly as a basic need. I guess it more and more becomes a lifestyle there. The swinging couples have a very copious lives. They hunt new couples, organize swinging party, even find swingers online. Their neighbors who are not swingers think that they are normal and happy families. Yes, in general, they are nearly like that, yet have little secret lives at night.

The interesting point when you are a swinger is that you don't need to stand your husband or your wife till death. I mean stand the boring sexual life, having sex with just only one person for tens years. It could be very good at the beginning, but later, it became tepid and finally, dead. Ok, I don't mean that having sex is like tasting a food that you need to change dishes all the time, and trying new food is always encouraging and inspiring, but not the same with trying sexual intercourse. But think twice, is there anything you don't need to change for a new one. You change your age, change your house, change your mobile phone, change boyfriends, even change your personalities. That makes the entertaining point of life.

I'm not yet a woman, but I think that it will be so bored if just try the same thing and same thing again with just only one person. And out there, definitely, many people share the same thought, just they don't yell for the whole world to know. Of course, we are now in the 21st century, and a legal relationship (marriage) just regards the joint of emotional and economical life between one wife and one husband. And cheating on your partner will ruin the marriage. But the fact is swinging is changing partner according to the agreement between both parties. And each couple has their own rule in this game to keep the relationship in control. Like in that TV show, they have the rule kind of can stop the other partner whenever one begins to feel irritated or they will always have sex together at the beginning and the end of the intimacy course with another partner. They also can have a talk after the swing to tell about their experience and their feeling for the other couple. The fact is that most swingers have quite stable marriage than the normal couples. They can enjoy the sex lives legally without cheating on their partners and knowing the same time that your partner feel satisfied also. Like every other things, at first, it seemed new and people have nearly no experience of it; but later people will gain experience with it gradually. Swing cannot be like a lifestyle now, but to some minority, it is undeniably the inevitable thing in their living. They make it by various ways like swing party, surfing online to find a partner couple.

And last but not least, I don't encourage anyone to try it out. I just want to say that to me the fact that you are over 50 (all couples in that interview are over 50), and you still enjoy your sexual lives together with your partners, it sounds quite cool. I am an Asian, specifically, a Vietnamese, I know that I will marry and live faithfully with my partner (because here even just thinking about swinging is forbidden by the community rational thinking), and I don't have the desire to overcome that bias.

More entries: The pursuit of happYness (1), swinging (1), Taste of my music, Learning language, Love letter 1995

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09:27 AM Oct 27 2009

brasilero

brasilero
Germany

you are absolutely right!!!

have been in your country and met a few ppl there.

For me, an European, it was really new to see, how much restriction

you have in daily life. But, it mustn't be wrong !!!

That s your culture, and everybody have to respect that.

The sexual life, ppl have in America, also in 'Europe are 

more than surprizing. not from all ppl, but many of them

don t pay attention  and respect girls/women.

Go ahead, the change will also come to your country,

but in ages.

And "swingin," it s not  a "thing" ppl can be proud of.