Running from Reality...

Hi all, I've got sth to write and for me this is the best place to note it.

I am 22 years old male, sophomore english philology student and I am still running from reality - I don't want to be a part of it, even the smallest one. I don't have any importat aim in my life. I'm tired of life, constantly dreaming about past times. When I was 16 years old and the whole world was simply fantastic and amazing. Back then I had friends (even one bestfriend whom I'm really missing), dreams, goals. Maybe they were very stupid and naive (because, how anyone could take seriously my babbling about "great adventure" to China) but they gave me power to live.

I'm training, listening to music, smoking or drinking - I'm trying everything just to keep my mind busy - I don't want to think about "real" life. I'm dreaming about other worlds - more colorful, filled with fantasy creatures and happiness. Whats more I really miss my old friends. Nowadays I am living in diffrent city, I don't know anyone here, I don't even have time to make friends. My bestfriend is living in UK now and it is far away from him... fuck I really miss him...

There will be no conclusion in the end because I didn't make any. Am I pathetic ? Maybe... but it is my way of life...